


i can't trust the fall.

by tokidorito



Series: wasted potential. [1]
Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Character Analysis, Character Study, Gen, POV Second Person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-28
Updated: 2018-03-28
Packaged: 2019-04-14 06:15:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 721
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14129853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tokidorito/pseuds/tokidorito
Summary: Just because you're North's twin doesn't mean you can't also be South.Character analysis of South Dakota and her background.





	i can't trust the fall.

It starts with your parents. 

That's the case with most things, isn't it? As long as you could remember, you were always raised to higher expectations. It was always "we expected better" and "we're disappointed in you" and "if your brother can do it, why can't you?". You know it wasn't his fault, you know you shouldn't  _blame_ him, but your adolescent heart, tainted by stinging words and wilting flowers, hated him. You hated North for a bit. It took you a long time to figure out that you didn't hate North, you hated how everyone else treated him. 

In some way, he's what you could've been. His flowers bloomed, nurtured by the love the two of you were supposed to share. You've always known  _why_ he was chosen over you. He was the baby that your parents wanted, the one that was expected, who they cleared out the den for and covered with racing car posters and bright blue wallpaper.

You were just an afterthought.

You've always been an afterthought. It was never just  _you_ , you were always grouped with him. North's sister. North's twin. The twins. Never you, never you, never  _just_ you. Always North. You can't blame others for loving him either, he was the model citizen, the paragon of everything good. He spoke with a kind, nurturing tone, never hurt anyone on purpose, never did anything wrong  _because of course he couldn't he was North, he couldn't do_ anything  _wrong_. You, on the hand, you're a troublemaker. A brat. A bitch. Whatever insults they threw at you, you took it, because at least then, you weren't considered  _North's sister_. They didn't want to ruin his name nor his reputation like that. You were just South when they called you a bitch. 

If you were the opposite of him, they couldn't compare you to him. 

Comparing was  _expectations._ Everyone seemed surprised - disappointed, even - when they saw you. They expected someone caring, sweet, someone like North. An angel. Whenever someone asked you if you were just joking (you knew they were just asking if you were trying to piggyback on the success of North), you spoke with a sharp tongue, words acid. They'd call you a bitch because they were just asking a  _question_ , and you'd smile, because now, you're not _North's sister._ You're South. 

Just South.

You thought it would stop when you entered the UNSC. Everyone was given codenames. You should've expected they would label you as South Dakota and him as North Dakota, so you fought harder to keep the personalities separate. You didn't trust anyone, never confided in any of the other freelancers -  _what's the point? They're just going to prefer North over you, you're always going to disappoint people._ It was better that way. You could focus on your mission, get onto the leaderboard, show everyone that you weren't just a copy of him. You weren't just an afterthought meant to disappoint people.

They gave him an AI.

You didn't want it in the first place, whatever. It was better for his 'nurturing' nature. Doesn't matter. You don't care - why would you care that he's being picked over you again? Why would you care that you can't even prove your worth on the leaderboard because someone better bumped you down? Why would you care over it again and again as if it hadn't happened before?  _Why does it still surprise you that you're as replaceable as always?_

You killed him.

You were caught up in everything - the argument beforehand, the Meta, how  _goddammit why is he always better than you what side is he even on **we're supposed to be family**_. You've gotten over your hatred for him over the years, you understand that it's not his fault, but gods, you're a monster. You turned in your own brother to save your life. You killed him. You killed him. You killed him.

Your death was a long time coming. 

You deserved whatever Wash threw at you. You die thinking of the times that you and North were just siblings, of how you hoisted him up on your shoulders and he grabbed the chocolate off the top shelf, how he covered for you and took the blame himself, how you two were  _family_.

Just because you're North's twin doesn't mean you can't also be South.


End file.
